Funny Quotes of the Day

[Symphix]

Just have some fun by giving us a laugh, chuckle or scowl (who does that anyway) with a quote/s that you feel is funny.

The Scarlet Pimpernel is the most overrated human being since Judas Iscariot won the A.D. 31 Best Disciple Competition. - Edmund E. Blackadder, Esquire from Blackadder the Third

[Stingray]

my health class. Sadly I don't think I could post any of the stuff here.

[Mike Arcanum]

Hitler's dead. I'm the next best thing.

[Kichsuu]

Her-I farted on you!
Me- I farted better!

[MicroRave]

"Hello City Garbage Disposal, You Chuck it We Truck It!"

[MicroRave]

"I want to go on that ride daddy!"
"me too son!"

[Symphix]

Theatre is acting. Acting is theatre. Theatre is not theatre cause that would be silly.

[Oamfrog]

teacher: this is a symbol in the book
Emry: I dont think it is
Teacher: it is
Emry: I dont think so
teacher: yes, it is
Emry: it doesnt seem like a symbol
teacher: well its symbol
Emry: well, I dont think it is
teacher: DAMN IT EMRY it's a symbol!
--------
Mr. F: kay guys enough of looking at the fire trucks going down the street, lets focus on algebra. OH MY GOD! look how fast that police car just went!! awsome!

[MicroRave]

"soldier: HELLO I NEED YOUR TO CONNECT ME TO THE PENTAGON"
"indian guy: sir the attitude isn't making anythnig better, I need you to speak very calmly and clearly ok?"
"soldier: JUST CONNECT THE CALL"
"indian guy: also would you be interested in a premium plan?"
"soldier: I don't have time for this I'm in the middle of a WAR!"

LOL

[Oamfrog]

Me: *doing homework* okay, I have to use the word Likeliness in a sentanc....WHEN THE HELL WOULD YOU USE THAT WORD?!
Cory: *pokes me* POKE
Em: let her be, she's doing her homework!
Cory: *bugs me for 10 more minutes*
Me: Okay I have to use the word marriage in a sentance! "I will never commit to marriage with Cory because he is annoying!"
Cary: thats bad gramar
Em: OH MY GOD! She actually wrote it in the space!
------
and it stayed my answer