Funny Quotes of the Day

[singing_star]

B:I am taking you thumb hostage. *grabs thumb*
Me: ??? OW BRIDGET OW

[MicroRave]

Forgot about this t'il recently

Geography Teacher: *writes pumkin on the board*
Me: *raises hand* That's not how you spell pumpkin
Teacher: Yes it is, how do you spell it then?
Me: You need a 'p' between m and k
Teacher: what? but it's not PUMP-kin
other student: maybe the dictionary?
Teacher: *checks and looks back at me*
Teacher: FINE!!!! *corrects spelling* HAPPY!?!
class: LOL

[Ponyprincess]

-Walking in town-

Me *Turns around* O_O " there is a person in a dog suit behind us"

M: " Haha, You should go hug it"

Me: "No, i'm good, tbh those kind of things scare me" -Walks over to a cash machien- "If we stay here till it passes it won't harrass us" :D.

-Dog runs up and hugs me-

Me *Screams*
M: *Laughs*
Dog : "Hello you"
Me: I'm being hug by a dress up dog...... WAIT, I KNOW YOU.
M: You do.
Me: Yup, It's T
M: T who?
Me: Poulter
T: Waheyyyy
M: Ohhhh hiiii *hugs the dogs*

[Miyura]

Me: QUICK! What's 2 times 2!?
Person: ...the better question is, what ISN'T 2 times 2?

[MicroRave]

L: So I'm gonna take a bouquet of flowers for my cosplay.
Me: Why?
L: So I can propose to Mikus, you go sing World is Mine when I do lol (She's going as Kaito lol)
Me: Naw not flowers, use a Leek instead
L: And what if she takes it?
Me: I burst into song and scare her away!
L: LOL no really what if she takes it?
Me: ....... better ring lots of Leeks!
L: And what if I propose to Len?
Me: Use Bananas. Tie a yellow ribbon around them, or a green ribbon for the leeks.
L: So go buy leeks and Bananas?
Me: Just pick one, you'll piss off one or the other for cheating.
L: So bananas or Leeks?
Me: grocery store and see which one's cheaper.
L: Bananas.
Me: Shota it is!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Home Ec:

Me: *stands by sink*
A: "Guess I'd better wash my hands. haha"
Me: "Yep..."
A: *picks one of the bottles from by the sink* *puts soap in his hand*
...
Me: "Why are you using hand lotion to wash your hands???"
A: "Wha -- http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png that was hand cream??!"
Me: *nods*
A: "Guess I should probably read the label"
Me: "Yeah"

[Ponyprincess]

I just got dissed by Tomo

Tomo Tornado says:
yeah!
hey wait a minute...
you have friends o.o
Tara says:
O_O I know, It is hard to belive right
Tomo Tornado says:
yeah O_O

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*is in truck*
Me: "Hey mom, have you heard the song "Celebrity Status"?"
Mom: "Nope"
Me: "I thought you did. It's been on Much quite a bit. It's awesome"
Mom: "Oh."
Me: "Hey, turn up the radio, please"
*turns radio up*
*song ends*
*Celebrity Status comes on the radio*
Me: "Oh look I was just talking about this song >.<"

..... D:

[Crazy]

While playing ping pong with some friends of mine, a kid decided to switch to a wooden paddle; "I need a woody."

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

I just got dissed by Tomo

Tomo Tornado says:
yeah!
hey wait a minute...
you have friends o.o
Tara says:
O_O I know, It is hard to belive right
Tomo Tornado says:
yeah O_O

don't worry, I say that to everyone ::D:

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

None of these happened today but I feel like posting these, and I don't know if I have already(which I possibly could have) XD...

[Stupid] Little kids on the bus:|
M: "Joke! Where do lions sleep?"
G: "uhhh *is stupid* The Gorilla Grounds!!"
Me: *looks at friend*
Friend & I: *burst out laughing*

....

Social Class:
Teacher: "And this guys name is [name], and this, this First Nations name is Frying Pan"
M: *Pfffffffffffffffffffffffft* Frying pan?!?!?!. Hahahaaaaa"
Me: "..... Hahahaha. And you spit on me. =["

.....

Teacher: "A pizza has mayo, anchovies, pizza sauce, mustard, broccoli, whip cream and chocolate on it. And so this pizza with... *attempts to remember what he said was on it*..."
Kid: *shouts "Barf" right in midst his sentence*
It was like "So this pizza with "barf" on it..."

hahahaaaa. xD

[Ponyprincess]

*Looking for new shoes*

H (Thinks she is being funny) "Look Tara, These are size three, They will fit you" *Laughs*
Me: "......I am size three"
H: *Pauses* "..........D: Making fun of you just doesn't wok does it"
Me: *Smiles* "Nope"




xDDD


Tara says:
MY SPELLING IS BAD AGAIN TOMO
Tomo Tornado says:
I'm so used to it
its like your own personal language!

PONYESE

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

ponyese :cool2:

[Ponyprincess]

PONYESE

[Solash]

You're lucky Tomo, I can never understand it =P

[Ponyprincess]

Your not meant to :D I do it to confuse you.




*Walking*
L: *Stops* "Oh no a dead bird" D:
Me: "Aww poor dead bird" *Goes to walk past*
L: *Stands there staring at it for a few minutes*
Me *Stops and looks at her*
L: *Happy grin* "Lets poke it"
Me: *Gives a weird look, walks up to her and pulls her away* "Leave the dead bird alone"

[Ponyprincess]

SOLASH SAID SOMTHING ALMOST NICE!!


cory says:
are to.
You are a bad representation of your country.
Tara says:
Are not
>.< and yeah
cory says:
=D
Tara says:
D=
cory says:
If it makes yah feel better, You're the coolest British person I've ever met.
...but you are the only, so I guess that also makes you the most lame.
Tara says:
Coming from you thats a complimant

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Radio Announcer 1: "And that was "Marianas Trench by--...."
Radio Announcer 2: "Dude, that WAS Marianas Trench."


Radio Announcer: "That was a great song by the Chiffons(He pronounced it Chif-ens)!"

[MicroRave]

Me: *points at TV* Kajiji!
Dad: Who farted?
Me: ......Not saying
Dad: http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png I'm just asking who did it
Me: I dunno *lies*
Mom: Must've been the dog
Me: Before I was interrupted I was saying that Kajiji is where aunt Suzie bought her dog

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*says this out on a whim*
Me: "People from Edmonton should be called Edmontonians."
Mom: "They are."
Me: "Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?"

*song plays on radio*
Me: "They sound like a Nickelback wannabe."
*song ends*
Radio Announcer: "And that was Nickelback with ... -song name-."
Me: "XDD Nickelback wannabe. Haha"

[Ponyprincess]

Me: "...What's happening in Kennedy Gardens"?
L:" No idea, lets go look"

*Arrives in Kennedy*
Me: "Is that an american accent talking in the mic"?
L: ...Wait, American people.... American cars and....... American flags. IT'S AN AMERICAN FESTIVAL, NOOOOOOOOO RUN AWAY"!!!!

Me:" ...O_O, as much as we may regret this... i want to check it out"
L: "Meh, i guess"

*Walks further into Kennedy*
Me: "Ah, look a British flag ......Wait -_-.... It's the forth oh July"
L:" ...And they are celebrating it in England.... that's harsh"

[Stingray]

This was a few days ago, but... oh well

Joe: I'm gonna be in North Carolina for a while!
Andrew: Hey, my girlfriend is gonna be there, too!
Joe: YES! I can have sex with her!

[Shadownami92]

*I start up the lawn mower*
*lawn mower starts to give out a lot of smoke*
Me: Ummmm.....is it supposed to do that?
My Brother: Oh yeah it does that.
Me: I'm gonna ask mom and dad about that....
Mom who currently inquired my dad about the situation: Smoke? Oh yeah the lawnmower does that, it's just a little oil burning.
Me: D:

[JazzieAussie]

Little brother: Ahaha, did you see that sign? It said "have a safe and fun 4th of July." "Safe" AND "fun"? How can they say that?

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: *is not paying attention at all, really* "... You know, that is a really windy breeze."
Mom: "No, really?"
Me: "..."

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

BoTomoCho *hsus says (3:49 PM):
*glazed...
*do you
Cow Spooted says (3:49 PM):
*I don't! (laugh)
BoTomoCho *hsus says (3:49 PM):
*oh
*you don't like pancakes?!
*OKAY
Cow Spooted says (3:49 PM):
*...D:
*THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
BoTomoCho *hsus says (3:49 PM):
*what did you mean?
Cow Spooted says (3:50 PM):
*I ASSUMED
*WE WERE DISCUSSING AIDS.
BoTomoCho *hsus says (3:50 PM):
*...o_o

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Charlie says (10:05 PM):
*uwahahahahaha
*thought so much sheet music

[Ponyprincess]

Frog Master Strobelight says:
You always try to persuade me to do something
AND YOU ALWAYS WIN
Tara says:
so what are you going to do?
Frog Master Strobelight says:
Make an account LATER





FROGS COMING BACK

[FluteToot]

Friend: So where should we go to eat?
Director: Let's go to the Cracker Barrel.
Random Pedestrian: Burger Queen!

[Usa_bun-bun]

^that one was funny!!

i dont have a random funny quote from today...:(

[JazzieAussie]

Where there is pie, there you must also be.

I cannot be bribed with PIE. :>[:

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mom(on the phone): "Yeah, the specialty tea place had only oriental styled tea pots. None of them were china."
Me: "*eavesdrops* What. All of them were china! XD"

[Ponyprincess]

*Three guys look L up*
L: *Not relising, bursts into song*
Guys: *Weird look and walk off*



*At theme park playing duel*
Me: *on 500 points*
L: *On 2400 points*
"...You suck at this"
Me: "...-_- Shhh, i'm not a violent perso.. *Man apears* ..QUICK KILL HIM"

[JazzieAussie]

Grace says:
*idk hyper too much garlic
Iceberg says:
*XD
Grace says:
*8-}
Iceberg says:
*Garlic makes you hyper
Iceberg says:
*?
Grace says:
*YESSS
Grace says:
*@___@
Iceberg says:
*Well at least now I know you're not a vampire.
Grace says:
*Yes. :))
Iceberg says:
*I typed campfire the first time.
Grace says:
*....
Grace says:
*"campfire"!?
Grace says:
*NO
Iceberg says:
*YES.
Iceberg says:
*I DON'T KNOW WHY
Grace says:
*I AM NOT A CAMPFIRE.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: *has pinwheel* "Would you like to blow my pinwheel?"
...

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

CAMPFIRE

[Shadowlord]

Me being an idiot: Hmmm... this looks like a trap. What do you think Admiral Ackbar ?
Me doing my best Ackbar voice: Its perfectly safe!!!

[JazzieAussie]

"Did the lights just flicker, or am I blinking?"

[Ponyprincess]

Book: "I'm not being negative. i,m British, we don't do vision boards or self-help books. Well atleast not in public.

[Taills]

FrozenTits
1 week ago 91thumbs up

My wife said she hates this song. Said its gay. so naturally I pushed her down the stairs.

Source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqYBGcv41M8

[glazedmoon]

"If I die.. I want you guys to scatter my ashes over the internet. Especially on the forums."

[JazzieAussie]

[guy telling a story about how he stuffed things up his nose and couldn't get them out]
Woman overhearing: Aw, how old were you?
Guy: Uhh... this was yesterday.

"If I die.. I want you guys to scatter my ashes over the internet. Especially on the forums."::D:

[TanzPinguin]

1. Me: I'm cold.
Mark: You're cold? It's 90 degrees outside!
Me: WELL IM COLD
Mark:......you're blood's broken.



2. Zeke: put tis put tis put tis
HUHHHHHHHH
...that didn't work to great.
xDD

[Ponyprincess]

BoTomoCho says:
I only get 20 minutes to eat!
WHAT
MY CAT
IS MY BROTHE


O_O Tomo is going to eat his cat.

[FluteToot]

O_O TOMO.
My friend Sam is really really short. We call him 'hobbit'.
Me: When we go roll Sam's yard, we should make a sign that says, 'I'm TALLER THAN YOU!'
Val: No. That's mean.
Me: O____O
Val: However, what is not mean, is taping a sign that says 'the shire' to his mailbox.
Me: Lesdoit.

You'll never guess what I snuck out last night to do :D

[JazzieAussie]

Gracie stars in...

When Comebacks Backfire!


"Is this any good?"
Gracie: "Yeah! Tastes like sesame chicken."
Me: "I dunno, seemed more like orange chicken to me. Kind of sweet and spicy."
Gracie (to me): "YOU'RE sweet and spic- *stomps* no No NO [B]NO. :>[:"

[TanzPinguin]

Driving down the road.
Train comes up.
Patti: "You see that light?"
Silence.
me and zeke: "...yeah?"
Silence.

[Oamfrog]

Anne-It's from some foreign country with a really cool name.
Me: CHAD?!
Everyone: WTF Kat?

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Sir Prizes says (8:36 PM):
*Uguu

[FluteToot]

Dylan: *eats the rice*
Me: What do you think?
Dylan: All I taste is the seasoning. I can't taste any rice.
Me:....................................Rice has no taste, idiot.

[Ponyprincess]

...o.o Rice has taste!
Convo seems harsh but it was funny at the time.

-Friend smokes-
Steven: L, stop smoking.
Me: You really should, this is like your 5th one in 2 hours.
L: Oh well, you'll live
Me: Yup, but you won't

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

AHAHAHA

and rice does have taste!

[TanzPinguin]

You've been aquitted of all the charges, how do you pleed?
Guilty!
...But you've been aquitted.
xD

[FluteToot]

"If I really wanted to hear the pitter-patter of little feet, I'd put shoes on my cat."
"I can't reach the brakes on this piano."
"I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious."

DOES JAZZIE KNOW WHO SAID THIS?

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Scenario:
*I walk into house*
*nicely gets into house and steps on an air horn thing*
*air horn makes a super loud noise*
"Aw, man, seriously? D;"

WHY WAS IT STRATEGICALLY SET THERE FOR ME TO SET ON?!

[JazzieAussie]

"If I really wanted to hear the pitter-patter of little feet, I'd put shoes on my cat."
"I can't reach the brakes on this piano."
"I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious."

DOES JAZZIE KNOW WHO SAID THIS?
SHE DOES, INDEED!


[after dinner]
Grandpa: I'm gonna cut me a piece of pie. You want one, too?
Me: No thank you, I'm full.
Grandpa: What's that got to do with eating?!

[TanzPinguin]

xDD
I agree.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

My dad did the same thing as I did with that air horn. XDDD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*Listening to Galaxie Music Channel on TV*
*Song comes up*
'Title: Memories
Artist: If You're Wondering If I Want
Album: Memories'

[Ponyprincess]

L: -Has moved to a uni in wales-
*On phone* "You have replaced me with Adam? A member of the oppisit sex? That's gay.... no, hang on... That's straight!

[TanzPinguin]

"Gabbie's retarded!"

".....She's special."
xD

[FluteToot]

*gives Physics teacher awful drawing*
Me: It's you, Coach H.!
Him:...Is this really how I look.
Me: Yeah! *runs away*
Him: Thanks.......?

[TanzPinguin]

^ xDD

"I expected you to pull a sandwich out of your pocket."

"I have water...."

[FluteToot]

Opposing band's director: *turns to her entire banding, grabbing my dad and shoving him into their midst* THIS GUY USED TO BE MY STUDENT!
Dad: D:
Director: I BET HE CAN STILL PLAY TROMBONE!
Dad: My daughter's the clarinet that had the xylophone thing.
Director: You can leave now.

XD

[TanzPinguin]

(Playing MM)

Me: "Look a squirrel!!"
Z: "Honey, that's a sparrow."
Me::sad:

[FluteToot]

We were crossing the dam and looking at the birds on the rocks on the band bus yesterday.

Steve: When I was little, I used to think those were penguins.
Me: Hahahaha, silly.
Steve: ...... :(
Me: I used to think they were squirrels.
Steve: *weird look*
Me: I was a cool kid.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Toby(on air): "If we don't have the song you guys requested, I'll switch it for something as close to the other song as I can. So, if you request Metallica, I'll play Rick Astley."

I love Toby. xD

[Oamfrog]

Liz- I'm in a bad mood. So, if you are on my bad side I suggest you pick a god to pray to.
Me- VISHNU! I choose you!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Toby & Anthony(on air): [to the tune of Adam Lamberts' 'If I Had You']"If I had turkey, Salt & pepper would be all I need~"

Thanksgiving. =]

[MicroRave]

Dad: I'm having a piece of your fudge

*3 days later*

Me: Who ate all the fudge!?!

Dad: I said I was gonna have a piece...

Me: ONE PIECE IS NOT SIX!!!

Mom: I only had 2, you had 4!!

Me: You never crave anything until it's gone anyway...

[JazzieAussie]

Apparently there's a place around here called Switzerland.

Little kid riding in the car sees the sign: "Switzerland, hm? There isn't any snow, and I don't see any watches."

[Oamfrog]

L: I don't think the Ukraine is part of Russia
M: All I know is that Stalin was a d**k to them. I just summed up a genocide in the worst way.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "Ew, why is there liquid cheese on my sandwich?!!"
Dad: "... Cheese-whiz?"

[Oamfrog]

Sleep is incredibly healthy for you. So cutting time out of your morning schedule gives you more time.for sleep. So showing up to school like a scumbag is good for your health!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Melissa: "Cody and Connor were somewhere and then Cody asked me via text if I had this pink polka-dotted bikini... So I asked him why, and he said he wanted to borrow it. o_o"
Me: "Haha, should we help your friend accomplish his drag dreams?! XD"

.... Queer~

[Oamfrog]

So, within this conversation this boy is trying to ask me out
Boy:...yeah I go on 4chan a lot
Me: 4chan? isn't that site, like, weird?
Boy: well, yeah. But it's funny.
Me: No, like, isn't there a lot of pervy stuff on there?
Boy: Well, yeah, but I don't look at it. Well actually I do but...

[Ponyprincess]

Little Sister: (aged 1) -Hands me a learning toy laptop thing-
Me: -Opens-
Little Sister : -Stares-
Me: -Looks for on button-
Little Sister: -Stares-
Me: "Erm... i can't find the on button sorry"
Little sister: "Presses on button and walks off with it"
Me: "..."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*T has 18 poppies on his shirt*
T: "I look like Billy Mays."
*T leaves*
S: "Who's Billy Mays?"
J: "Billy Mays! OXY CLEAN. He told me to buy it so I did! And he's dead!"
S: "What He's DEAD?"
J: "YEAH HE IS."
S: "I didn't know that."
R: "Hey what's that Slap Chop dudes name?"
J: "VINCE! And he's in jail~"
R: "No he's not"
J: "Yeah he is. Vince from slap chop!"
R: "Go Vince Yourself."
S: "GO VINCE YOURSELF. AHHA."
J: "Haha That's so stupid."
R: "No, the only thing that's stupid is that we're laughing at that!"

[Oamfrog]

Three different people heard the same creepy guy say these things in the parking lot.
*to a group of students* I'm going to a gay strip club.
*while walking towards two girls* I'm going to hell anyways so I might as well smack their asses .
*to my teacher* I'll never understand women so I might as well stay gay.
I think he was having some inner turmoil.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mom(to Dad): "Why are you sitting there?*points to chair*"
Me: "Because he likes hard things! ......... >_> Chair. Hard chair over couch."


~ After watching the Discovery News thing about the "popcorn in slow motion"
Me: "I don't think ... I can ever eat popcorn again... It looked so beautiful in slow motion T_T" =P

[Ponyprincess]

Me: I fancy chinese foood~
Adam: again?
Me: Yeah :D
Adam: -Sigh- can't we get something else?

-Passed 6-
Me: We still need food
Adam: But nothings open it's sunday
Me: :D aww well i guess we have no choice but to get chinese
Adam: ..Damn it
Me: WIN!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Person 1: "10 True Animal Rescues..."
Me: "I thought he was going to say "10 True Animal Recipes" >_>"
Person 2: "*Chinese imitation* How to Wok/Walk Your Cat!"

el oh el.

[JazzieAussie]

"I need to take a picture!"
[Guy walking by thumbs toward something]
"There's a port-a-potty over there if you wanna use it."

"I want a ukelele for Christmas."
"But.. you already have guitar that you never play."
"I can't! It's too small."

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Mr. Tomo says (12:41 AM):
*can trillian draw pics
Phlogistic says (12:41 AM):
*GYARADOS

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

They were talking about how I had no Christmas spirit and stuff.
Person1: "She's like a SMWG."
Me: "WHAT PFFT That sounds like a car. xD"
Person2: "What's it stand for?!"
Person1: "A Single Mad White Girl."
Me: "Eh??"

[Oamfrog]

I was just reminded of this conversation I had with a boy right before my first confession.
Boy: So are you gonna confess face to face with the priest or are you gonna use the screen?
Me: I'm using the room.
Boy:I'm doing face to face. There's nothing to be afraid of, what's he gonna do? Jump up and molest you?

[Ponyprincess]

-Playing darts (Killer) -

Roo -hits his number
Jo- Hits her number
Me- doesn't hit number
Adam- hits his number
Simon- Hits his number
Roo- Hits his number
Jo- hits her number
Me: ... *Jokingly* I'm actually really good, i'm just pretending to be rubbish
*Throws dart* -Hits bullseye-
Everyone: O_O

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

K: "Who here thinks Santa really exists?!"
Me: "I have mixed opinions on that."
T: "He doesn't exist."
Me: "If you say that, you're basically saying your parents don't exist."
K: "... I also have a mixed opinion on that now."
xD

[TanzPinguin]

"Mom, how big around is my neck in inches?"
XD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Question on Freak the Mighty in class today:
"What do Max and Gwen say Kevin has in his pants when he's excited?"

XDDDDD
"Ants" HAHA.

[MicroRave]

Question on Freak the Mighty in class today:
"What do Max and Gwen say Kevin has in his pants when he's excited?"

XDDDDD
"Ants" HAHA.

I think i get that joke now xD

[TanzPinguin]

"My foot really itches"
"Is it from the Pez?"

[MicroRave]

Me: *holding glass of milk*
Smokey: *smells milk*
Me: *moves glass*
Smokey: *follows*
Smokey: *licks bottom of glass*
Me: You don't understand the concept of glass do you?
Smokey: *looks pissed*

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mid conversation: "I used to squeak his rabbit."

Clay: "Hey, where'd Cassie go? I wanted to look at her shirt..."
*Cole turns around and stares at him*

Announcement: "And everyone congratulate the Girls Junior High basketball team on their loss in the game of 56-7!"

[TanzPinguin]

"AHH!! I got snow in my ear."

"So you have....sledder's ear?"

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

"Ah, Darn, those low sodium chickens!"

^ ... Yep.

[FluteToot]

"They have all the episodes on Youtube. I'm not sure it's legal, but it's nice."

We were forced to read Freak the Mighty last year XD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

"... What a perverted woodpecker."
XD

And, "Forced", Clarinet? XD
I wasn't against reading the book, just all the stuff we had to do with it. =[

[TanzPinguin]

Me: "Someone give me a job so I can get a WoW account."

My cousin Ryan: "Wow, we'll take that into account."

[FluteToot]

We were sitting in the bass drum cabinet/shelf thing in the bandroom.
Steve: *points to odd mark on the wall*
What is that?
Me: Oh, that? Indiana Jones left that the last time he was here.

Me: ...Robert E. Lee.
Guy: Who's he?
Entire room: *intense stare*

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "I'm really a Saskatchewanese person... I don't admit that though..."
J: "I know!!!1 Me too! I never say that. ALBERTAAAA."
Me: "Saskatchewan sucks, yo."

Ahah. All thanks to the hospital being in Saskatchewan. XD

[TanzPinguin]

"Dang girl, I like yo side ponytail."

"... You're weird."

[MicroRave]

This was mid debate somewhere, supposed to be about DUI checkpoints. Coincidentally, the OP didn't accept that Canada's situation was different than the US.

Person 1: Checkpoints aren't mandatory anyways, drunks could easily avoid them.
Person 2: You're forgetting about impaired judgment.
Person 1: They could still avoid them.
Person 2: I'll bet you $500 that it won't work if you tried it
Person 1: On second thought, it wouldn't work

Forget where this one was

Girl: We need to talk
Girl: about the direction of our relationship
Girl: I feel like you're ignoring me
Boy: c-c-c-Combo Breaker!
Girl: what is wrong with you?

[Sgt. Frog]

JAZZ says
NO
NO
NOT ANOTHER FIRE DRILL
NO

Frog says
OH NO

JAZZ says
...
OH
JUST
TORNADO WARNING
PHEW

Frog says
..
..

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO I DON'T WANT TO SKATE. NEVER. T_T
... Last year I used a chair. I WENT LIKE, A METRE. YAY. This year, my goal's 2 metres. :cool2:"
Jade: "... You're such a loser. xD"
Me: "I know, hey?? CHAH."

Teacher: "We're going to the arena for phys ed."
C: "Hey Vani! WE'RE NOT ON SKATES. YET."
Me: "... T_T BUT WE WILL BE SOON."

Teacher2: "As we're going on the ice, if anyone has a cellphone, and doesn't want to break it, I'll hold it for you."
*at least 10 cells are given to him*
Teacher2: "And so yeah... PLAY."
*radio/phone rings*
Teacher2: "NO THAT'S MINE AND IT'S AT THE BOTTOM OF MY POCKET. D:"

*game in class*
Guy: "HEY. We should totally "phone a friend"
Teacher: "Who has their phone here to do that?"
*a few people take out theirs, and a few people say they do*
Teacher: "Okay... Who has their phones?"
*2 guys raise their hand*
Teacher: "Cool, bring 'em up here. ;D Can totally have them back later~"

[TanzPinguin]

J: Oh I guess we need to work on our singing then.

Me: Yeah, sound like a black man and then I'll recognize the song.

XD

[Ponyprincess]

Man: How old are you
Me: 18
Man: Would you consider going out with someone 30 years older then you?
Me: ...I have a boyfriend

O_O Some people scare me!

[SiamJai]

LOL Pony, was that IRL or online? I hope it's only the latter, but it's still ewwie. XD

Reminds me of a quote I came across some time ago:

Woman: So, people who date people a lot younger than themselves are called "Cradle robbers", since I date men a lot older than me, does that make me a "Grave robber"?

[TanzPinguin]

...
People scare me. XD

[JazzieAussie]

"Love you lunches! Er... lots. I mean bunches."

[MicroRave]

http://images4.fanpop.com/image/polls/575000/575084_1289157667714_full.jpg

[Ponyprincess]

LOL Pony, was that IRL or online? I hope it's only the latter, but it's still ewwie. XD


IRL D: what made it funnier was that my boyfriend was outside at the time.

[FluteToot]

In Life Skills class we were going over what you do and you don't have control over in your life, and the woman passes out cards with a characteristic on it. Mine says 'Home Life' and has the following quote on the bottom:

Card:"Just because I make mistakes doesn't mean I am a mistake."-Kelly Rowland
Me: WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING HERE?

And then she did this thing where a girl in my class supposedly only got minimum wage, and ended up going broke after apartment rent, car payment, etc.

Girl: I ain't got no more money *giggle giggle*
Me: Dang, girl, you needs to find yo'self a mannnnnnnnn.

[TanzPinguin]

^ Sugar Daddy? XD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Student: "Hey, with all this mexico stuff, did tacos originate from there?!"
Mrs H-B: "Yeah. We'll talk about it later."
Me: "Hmm, taco 'bout it later, eh?"

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

More of an interesting scenario:
On ice, at the rink, during phys ed, with helmets on:

Clay: "Vaniiiiiii!!! Aw, do I get a hug? :D"
Me: "Uh sure? xD"
*hugs*
Clay: "How are youuuuuuu?"
Me: "Good. :D"
Clay: "That's good that you're good 'cause I'm good."

Gotta love my classmate, el oh el.

[FluteToot]

Drummer: We have just as much competition among us as you [clarinets] do.
Me: Yeah, but all you guys have to do is beat on stuff.
Drummer: Yeah, we have beating skills and you guys have blowing skills. But we still try to beat each other in chair chairouts just as hard as you do!
Clarinets:LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Drummer: O_o What?
Steve: You..... said, you.... said..... BLOWING SKILLS!

[JazzieAussie]

"I THINK YOU HAVE MORE SENSE THAN WHATEVER YOU THINK I'M THINKING YOU THINK"

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Phlogistic says (1:44 AM):
*you know what I wish
Phlogistic says (1:45 AM):
*I wish it was socially acceptable for men to carry parasols!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

B: "I thought Ottawa was in Nunavut..."

XD

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Misaka Shiori says (8:02 PM):
*oyasumi = goodnight!
Kelsey says (8:02 PM):
*NO WAY IT MEANS DONKEY

[Adelaide]

(H)
Everyone knows that.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

For reference, Harrison is an adorable, little, Asian child my friend babysits/lives with. Basically her little brother. :D

~Harrison made a little "love bug" craft thing at scouts, for Valentine's Day~
Janelle: "Hey Harrison, are you going to give that to your girlfriend?"
Harrison: "...Are you serious? I'm in grade 2."

And for "decency" reasons, spoilers around it, yay:
~Janelle and Harrison playing around~
Harrison: "It's a good thing I can't grab you in your vagina."
Me: "... WHAT did he just say? AHAHAH"
Janelle: "Hah. He did just say what you thought he said."

[FluteToot]

Album on Dad's iPod:
I'm Not The One by The Black Keys
Unknown Brother by the Black Keys
Never Gonna Give You Up by the Black Keys

Me:
http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRFLEY4iYSwMh2ztCbfCtqM80WcYAe29 U3xsP-Lhoyv-guM31taTJcwm_Jm3A

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Outside the elementary talking:
Jade: "Hey, you're late for piano. Hah. You and your banana juice."
Me: "Hey it's not banana juice, it's "deliciously yellow" juice. >:P"
Jade: "What-ever~"
Me: "Yeah!"
Random kid: "Hello old people from another world than me~"

I dunno, it was just kind of random and funny, I think. Hah.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mom and I sitting in room, me painting my nails, radio on & on country music channel:
(song comes on)
Song: "She's as pretty as a field of daisies."
Me: "Whaaaaaaat AHAHA. I thought he said "field of hay bales". o_o Ahaha."
Mom: "Ahaha."
Me: "I wonder if that's an insult or complimentttttttttt."
Song: "Chicken and biscuitssssssssssssssss."
Me: "Chicken and biscuits... What. OH MY GOD THIS IS TERRIBLE."
Mom: "Ahahaaaaa I know."
Me: "Ahaaaaaaaa... Dude, the nail polish fumes are totally getting to us~"

:cool2:

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

I'm just keep posting in here~~

From yesterday:
Radio: "Now it's time for Don Cherry's Grapevine!"
Don Cherry: "Yeah, yeah, ... well, that one heritage game in Iqaluit that one year. THE CAMERA'S FROZE. It was -75C!..."
Me: "-75C!? I wonder how cold that is in Fahrenheit... *takes phone to convert it* -75C = *Beep* ERROR. WHAT? Ahahaa. Error."
[-103F btw xD]

And last night before bed:
Me: "Oh look, a paper bag. I wonder what's in it?"
*dumps bag out*
Me: "Oh hey, these are those finger-puppets from the craft fair on my birthaaaaaaaaaaay! OH WAIT. LOOK. 40 BUCKS. I'M RICH.... That's where it disappeared to..."
:cool2: Finding money in random places.

[Aysami_Ari]

Air ee... yo says:
haha
):
Vaniii☆ says:
Your face seems to be put upside down there, mister. Would you like to have dangerously dangerous reconsructive surgery to reorganize your disorganized appearance?
Air ee... yo says:
kitty?

I didn't know what to say. o.o

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Awi... yo says:
whats a vug
Vamiii☆ says:
A vug, is a vug. A vug of certainic vuginess which occupies space under a rug.

Yo.

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Jazzie: WOOO WOOOOOO
boy_tomo_chan: GADUN GADUN
boy_tomo_chan: GADUN GADUN
Jazzie: CHUGGACHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA
boy_tomo_chan: WOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOOO
Jazzie: CHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGACH UGGACHUGGACHUGGACHUGGA
boy_tomo_chan: WOOOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[JazzieAussie]

They're coming to take us away HA HA!

[Mike Arcanum]

Are you doubting my powers of amnesia?

yes I am

[argus]

argus
I love you babe.

Aleydreamer
>3 I am older than you. I expect a better name than Babe

argus
Expectations will only disappoint you.

Aleydreamer
<3 That's okay, any time you hurt me, I just grow my wounds around you and swallow you into mah soul <3
-Nuzzle-
><; I just realized I had a creepy moment....

argus
Talking to too many fangirls/stalkers can do that to you.
Wait.
You're a fanfic writer.
THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING

Aleydreamer
XDDDDD
-LAUGHS ASS OFF-

[Aysami_Ari]

Ari: i need to do something. I CAN clean my room.

Nick: That sounds fun.

Ari: mehh someones gtta do it. i wish i hada http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png to clean my room for me.

Nick: its possible lol.

Ari: u wanna be my http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png?

Nick: when you put it like that no lol

Ari: awwww :( can i be ur master? haha.

Nick: still when you put that way no lol i will help you clean your room if i could.

Ari: thats not good enough for me haha jk.

Nick: :)

... Dammit.

[JazzieAussie]

Marvin O'Gravel Balloon Face says:
*Why was school cancelled though? o_O
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says:
*I can't say
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says:
*because I like living
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says:
*and if I told you you would kill me

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

doesn't everyone like living?

[Aysami_Ari]

Today at walmart with mom n gmom:

It was pretty cowarded there...

*walks over to posters*
Me: OH EM GEE!!! IT'S JUSTIN BEIBER. OMG OMG! (being stupid)
*everyone looks*
Mom: *starts cracking up*
Worker Lady: *starts cracking up*
Other people in the store: *look at me*
Me: (feels accomplished of my stupidity)

on the way home from walmart.

Mom: Is this a two way street?
*she turns into the street*
Me: It is now.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Sharlie: Knock knock
Janelle: Who's there?
Sharlie: Mike SnivverPivvet.
Janelle: *hesitantly* Mike SnivverPivvet who?
Sharlie: MIKE SNIVVERPIVVET HOW MANY DO YOU KNOW OPEN UP THE DOOR IT'S COLD OUT HERE
Janelle & I: Ahaha.
Janelle: I know 2:cool2:
Jessica, Beckie, and Melissa: ...what.

Too hard to explain anything else~

[TanzPinguin]

They're coming to take us away HA HA!

My grandma always says that when she hears sirens.
AND HERES MY QUOTE

"I could do it. I could milk DeNiro."

[TanzPinguin]

[Ashley Darnell]
9:25pm
....
I love you
even if you do eat alot
XD

[JazzieAussie]

"STOP YELLING AT ME, OLD TIMER."
"I'M NOT YELLING. I'M JUST TALKING LOUD ENOUGH SO I CAN HEAR MYSELF."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

"STOP YELLING AT ME, OLD TIMER."
"I'M NOT YELLING. I'M JUST TALKING LOUD ENOUGH SO I CAN HEAR MYSELF."

AHAHA.

Today:
Janelle: "Hey hey, a joke! A horse walks into a bar. 5 people leave due to the danger of the situation."
Us: "... what."

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Tomo: So I was thinking...
Glazed: REALLY?!?!?

[TanzPinguin]

Z: DID YOUR FACE JUST EXPLODE?!
G: What no!
Z: Oh wait, I have call waiting hold on

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "Ah, nothing to do now... WELL, let's walk around the school."
*walks past bio lab*
Movie in bio lab: "I surfaced in water, and there was stuff in my mouth."
Me: "... o____O"


And:
C: "Oklahoma..."
Me: "Where is that? I THINK IT'S NEAR MICHIGAN. BAH, I'M NO GOOD WITH MY US GEOGRAPHY. T_____T But I DO know where the states that my friends live in are. :cool2:"

[TanzPinguin]

The result of having friends that type in a ghetto manner:

Lashawnette: "sumin crzy happen to meh taday...one of ma ex's was this dudes friend tht he wnted me ta tlk to n i did bt idk i am salty rite nw"

Vonceiya: "whu uu tlkiin bout"

XDD Even someone that types the same was like whaaa?

[Mona101]

The funniest Quote of the Day????


My uncle was an angry man. His grave stone read "What you lookin at?!"

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Janelle and I are searching for our math teacher, and need to ask him about WHY he marked part of our questions wrong [specifically -6^2[which he marked it saying it should have been -36 XD]]:
Janelle: "WHERE IS HEEEEE."
Me: "He's too good at hiding. Ah... I'll just search him out after math[we don't have him now because of another teachers crisis, so we had a sub xD]."
*We get to watch a movie as a study in our next class, SO YEAH*
Movie[Mean Girls]: "And remember, the product of two negative integers can equal a positive!"
Us: "Pfft. Ironic. Ahah."

[FluteToot]

"Those lunch ladies were talking about stealing something, I swear."
"Yeah, Craig. They're conspiring to steal your hair and weave it into a basket with wicker, which they will promptly serve us potatoes out of."

Me: Darn it, I don't have pockets today *wearing tailored dress pants with fake pockets*
Guy friend: What? Then I suppose I'll have to make one.
Me: ...No.
Guy friend: Seriously, I'm going to cut open your pants.
Random person walking by: *hears this last part* O.o

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Saskatchewan bio movie thing: "She was about as cool as the point of Mount Shasta!"
Me: "... Oh wow. SUCH FLATTERY."

[Solash]

At my LAN last night.

Friend: *Looks at computer clock at 3 in the morning "It's 3 already? The hell, where'd the past two hours go?"
Me: "No idea" *Notices the time seemed to move incredibly fast.
Other Friend: *shrug*

That morning:
Me: Yo, it's already 10:30 due to the time changes, get up man.
Friend: ...time changes, well that'd explain where that hour went.
Me: /facepalm "durrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Kirsten: "blah blah blah..."
Melissa: "YOU KNOW WHAT? KNOW WHAT? I TOTALLY HATE YOU. HAH. *Shoves bag of lettuce in Kirsten's face*
Me: "... what."


Ty: "MY ORANGES ARE BIGGER THAN THAT ONE."


*tries to get into house, but dog is in the way & doesn't want to move*
*finally gets into house*
Me: "*sigh* HARLEY ISN'T MOVING."
Me: "*realizes what I just said*...Oh wait. AHAH."


Cassie: *listening to her music* "Don't lie to meeeeeeee~"
Us: *look*
Cassie: "What. It's the first 3 words of the song. D:"
Me: "Oh yeah. First 3. I'll remember that."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "Mom, are you going to help the girl guides out tonight with making those sock puppies?"
Me"... wait. Sock MONKEYS. It's what I get when trying to say monkeys and puppets. D:"


Wyatt: *has sandwich*
Mrs. Harty-Blanc: "And so ..."
KC: "HEY WAIT IS THAT MY SANDWICH?!"

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Blah. Just gonna keep posting random stuff in here... D:

Me: "Melissa, why do you have a book with a barbie doll on the front? Hah."
Melissa: "It's Ken."
Melissa: "Hm. I always thought Ken was black."
Me: "Haha."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Post, post, post... D;

Janelle and I walk from math to the washroom[like... 2 feet; across the hallway]:
*goes into*
*2 girls are in one stall and are "squeeing"*
Us: "... o______O"
Janelle: *silently* "Lets ... leave. o_O"


*silent reading class*
Ms Paull: This phone is so annoying *has someone's confiscated iphone*
*sets phone down*
*still silent reading*
Phone: *SUPER LOUD RAP MUSIC!*
People: "Hah."

[Taills]

"Well that was unexpected..."

-Last words of the Chaos Warmaster, Veran the Undefeatable

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

TIE says (9:50 PM):
*Interest is interesting, is it not?
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says (9:52 PM):
*it is interesting that you say interest is interesting as it interests me enough to say that interest is definitely interesting.
TIE says (9:54 PM):
*An interesting response, but it interests me to say that there is not enough interest in your interesting response.
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says (9:55 PM):
*How interesting that you point out that my self-proclaimed interesting post lacks interest. Can to interest me in why you find my interest filled sentence to without interest?
TIE says (10:02 PM):
*Though interesting, your response, interestingly enough had not enough interesting detail about your interest in interest.
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says (10:02 PM):
*Interesting.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Jade: "Give me a pencil so I can write down what I have to do tonight!"
Me: *hands over pencil*
Jade: "... Violin, piano... laundry..."
Me: "...You do laundry?"
Jade: "Yeah. If I'm feeling up to it."
Me: "I don't even know how to use a washing machine! ::D: AND, I also don't know how to cook! HAHA."
Jade: "... You'll make a great wife someday."
Me: "Pfft."

Told me the obvious. xD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

My badminton partner and I yesterday:
Janelle: "WE'RETHEHIGHLYCOMBUSTIBLEUNICORNSWHOLIKETOPOWERSMA SH AND YOU'RE GOING DOWN." *unicorn horn symbol*
Me: Yeah. What she said." *attempts unicorn thing*

Me: "Wonder if we'll have school tomorrow or not..."
Mom: "I wouldn't hold my breath on that."
Me: "Yeah really. I mean, de-oxygenize all your red blood cells, then like, knock yourself out."
Mom: "... That's not possible?"
Me: "No. But you can hold your breath, make yourself lightheaded, fall over, hit your head, and knock yourself out. :cool2:"

xD

[Ponyprincess]

(Terry is my 20 year old brother)

Me: you stole my zebra on animal crossing
Terry: wait wait what was its name
Me: savannah
Terry: aha like the desert cause zebras live in the desert, that's clever
Me:... zebras dont live in the desert
Terry: yeah they do, with the cheetahs
Me:... Terry zebras need grass to live and cheetahs dont live there either.
Terry: yeah they live in the grassy bits of the desert


(playing mariokart with a player called mummy)
Terry: aw, i was right up mummys arse... wait don't repeat that.


Terry: you can't fry noodles.... oh wait..

[TanzPinguin]

Your brother's funny XD

F: Have you felt how big this is?
Me: Yeah I was looking at it earlier and admiring its' thickness.
F: o_o ....

Talking about Animal Crossing: City Folk manual XD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Janelle: "So I went to the doctor yesterday. They told me I have to go to Edmonton for this thing..."
Me: "Aw, why?"
Janelle: "The doctor in Lloyd doesn't do "kids". ...Wait, that sounds bad."


Me: *has tiara*
Someone: "Nice tiara."
Me: :cool2:
Jarik: "HM. I think I'm gonna go buy one of those. Totally would suit me. Be pretty sexy, too. Haha."
Becky: "Hah. Dollar store tiara."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

At Haileigh's place:
*The Wiggles are on TV*
Zach[2 years old]: *points to the TV* "Daddy!"
Us: "o_O Oh my."

[TanzPinguin]

I WILL ONLY MAKE BROWNIES
IF
YOU
BOWL
[Tomo]
Report · 1:33am
bowl?
like
cut girls hair
into a bowl cut?
I can do that
[You]
Report · 1:33am
XD
NO.
bowl like
that thing
[Tomo]
Report · 1:33am
but I already started
[You]
Report · 1:33am
uh oh
let her go tomo...
[Tomo]
Report · 1:33am
NO!
[You]
Report · 1:34am
TOMO
YOU HAVE A PROBLEM
BUT ITS OKAY
just let the girl with the half chopped hair go
AND THEN YOU GET
BROWNIES.
[Tomo]
Report · 1:35am
I'm already done
she looks much nicer
she will thank me after she's done screaming

Made me laugh so hard XD

[I love (top)]

Me: "Oh look, there's japan right there, right?" *points at little map on computer screen*
My sister: "Uhhh, no that's new zealand"
Me: "But isn't that china right next to it?"
sister: "That's australia."
Me: "Ohhhhh, right. Then that's china, right?
sister: *headslap* "That's madagascar!!!"
Me: "Opps, I meant that one right there..." *finally points to china in the correct spot*

(I seriously did this three days ago, I have no idea what the heck was wrong with me, but in my defence, it was 1:00am. :blink::doh:)

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*is reading a Smurf comic; The Purple Smurfs*
Book says: "Smurf-reka!*"
* says: "An interjection expressing joy, usually uttered while in the bath."
Me: "o__O"

[Mona101]

My teacher goes up to my class on Valentines day and says:

Her: I think that Zac Efron is hot! He's my boyfriend! Teehee! ^_^
Us: *look at eachother*
Her: What? Can't a woman dream?
UGLY Guy Teacher: *walks in with flowers, its the middle of class* Hey, its Valentines day and I got no date, wanna be mine?
Her: Sure, I will be bored tonight anyway...
Us: Ewwwwww
Him: SHUT UP YOU DWARFS!
Me: He's ugly AND mean, double score! *rolls eyes*

Can't make good decisions! And she is like the prettiest teacher in school! This really happened... No kidding when I say that he is U-G-L-Y

[MicroRave]

Friend: so how r u?
Me: gud
Me: threw up a bit earlier
Me: then I had some garlic bread
Friend: was it gud
Me:.......
Me: dude... you meant the garlic bread right?

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Avaron Tenken says:
MUSTARD
ON A CHOCOLATE CAKE
Vanil☆ says:
WITH PEPPER ICING.
AND
AN OLIVE.
Avaron Tenken says:
AND EGG SHELLS
Vanil☆ says:
EGGSHELLS WITH A SIDE DISH OF PICKLED KIBBLES AND BITS.
Avaron Tenken says:
AND CAT FOOD SMUSHED TOGETHER WITH TREE BARK
Vanil☆ says:
AND A GRATED GLASS AND HAND SANITIZER SALAD
Avaron Tenken says:
AND FOR DESSERT.....
BURNED AND AGED STRAWBERRY TART WITH.....
I dunno
Vanil☆ says:
100% polyester whip cream topping.


XDD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Jacy: *writing paper on something* "Uh, hey, what's something unstable?"
Me: "The government right now."

[Taills]

Ok, this is the most ridiculous thing you have ever seen. What is taking place here is almost certainly illegal.

You're not sure which laws are being broken, but it is probably a lot.

[MicroRave]

Me: Hi Steve!
Bob: Hey Niki!
Me: *continues walking*
Me: Did i just call you Steve?
Bob: Fine with me!


Lack of sleep does amazing things... but at least I didn't keep mistaking shoes for cats (this time)

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*goes on this little kids book podcast site for an assignment*
*clicks on link*
Me: "Yo, Jacy, look at this[referring to the lameness of the site]."
Jacy: *reading* "Bang, Molly."
Us: "o___O"
Jacy: "OH WAIT, that's the authors name. AHAHA."

... Just... o_O

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

TIE says (1:53 AM):
*HOT COCOA
TIE says (1:57 AM):
*... It's good.

[MicroRave]

Clip came up on America's Funniest Home Videos where people are giving speeches at wedding receptions, for some reason it was mostly old people and every 2nd person stuck the Mic in their ear, except for this old lady that's yelling CAN YOU HEAR ME!!?!

Then this little girl's like "Karen your party was boring!"

The last lady wished the bride & groom good health, and good sex... then she realized what she said and fell over

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Polonius Vanil☆ says:
FRIDAY FRIDAY

WE SO EXCITED WE SO EXCITED.
XDD

EVERYONE'S FAVOURITE SONG.

TIE says:
PARTYIN' PARTYIN' YEAH!

Polonius Vanil☆ says:
x2
FUN FUN FUN FUN
LOOKIN' FORWARD TO THE WEEKEND.

TIE says:
I SEE MY FRIENDS
SITTIN' IN THE BACK SEAT, SITTIN' IN THE FRONT SEAT

Polonius Vanil☆ says:
GOTTA MAKE MY MIND UP
WHICH SEAT CAN I TAKEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

TIE says:
GONNA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY


xD
:cool2:

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Tara says (2:35 PM):
*What's that game where there is a dice in the middle of the board and you have 5 things that u need to get around the board before everyone elsr
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says (2:36 PM):
*sorry?
Tara says (2:36 PM):
*There is a board game
◕ ‿‿ ◕ says (2:36 PM):
*Nonono
*I think
*the name of the game
*is "Sorry"
Tara says (2:37 PM):
*O_O I'm confusef

[Ponyprincess]

:D it almost beats our "the clocks go forward" quote xD

[Mona101]

For me, I think that you people have to watch the krusty krab pizza episode again. I fell over laughing when I saw this one. srry this one's not a quote. Here's one:
"Just look at him, SQUARE, the shape of EVIL!" ~plankton

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Conversation about our childhood tv shows again:
Melissa: Hey hey LAZY TOWN. AND THAT GUY THAT GUY--
Sharlie: HE LIKE, FLIPPED AND FLOPPED OUT OF HIS AIRPLANE AND PRESSED A BUTTON AND FRUIT CAME OUT. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0CHAZJr3OE)
Janelle: AND AND ONE ARMED PUSH UPS. AHAAHAAHA.
Melisa: Sportacus!
Sharlie: Yeah! THAT GUY.
Me: o_____o Ahahaha.


Me: Hey Janelle, on the Teletubbies, what were those pancake things called?
Janelle: Uh....
Sharlie: TUBBY CUSTARD.
Me: ... How. How do you know that.

Me: CYBERCHASEEEEEE.
Janelle: IN CYBERCHASE WE'RE MOVING, WE'RE BEATIN HACKER AT HIS GAMEEEE DON'T YOU TELL ME [whatever the lyrics are] BUT MOTHERBOARD WILL BEAT HIM EVERYTIME... [And so on, till the end of the opening].
Me: ... really? THE WHOLE SONG.

[Akai Renge]

Campground owner: Look out for doghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png.
Me (not wearing my glasses): I can't see http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png without my glasses.

[TanzPinguin]

Me: I'M TOO IMPATIENT FOR THA DIRTY DAY CHALLENGE!!
Fro: You're retarded.


Darn speech impediments XD

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

*still snow on ground*
Ashley[by window]: "Hey guys, what's that white stuff on the ground? .... ..... WAIT, I DIDN'T MEAN THAT."



Me: "Woah, that pokemon looks like that one from ....uh.. pokemon."

[TanzPinguin]

Watching Clueless

Me: "What the heck happened in the 90's that made people dress like hookers and office workers at the same time?"

Mom: "Britney Spears."

[Sean D`blue]

Random Drunk guy at the pub I was at: Yo, you can't get flowers, flowers are like anti biotics. Women get immune to 'em.

[othyra]

On the official site there’s some honesty about exactly what to expect, with the admission that total removal of stretch marks will probably not occur. There’s also the admission that with Revitol, preventative measures work best. A pregnant woman is advised to start using it in the early stages of pregnancy. If a woman doesn’t consider buying Revitol until after she’s had the baby, she’s advised to not hesitate. The makers concede that the product works best on the newer, deeply-hued scars.

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

thats probably the funniest thing posted in this thread!

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Cassie: *google searches*
Cassie: "OOH That guy is hot."
Cassie: *runs over image to see name*
Cassie: "Adam Lambert, eh?" *writes on hand to remember to check out his music*
Me: "... Do you SERIOUSLY not know him? O_O Though, I do agree he's hot[*cough*, black hair]. AHAHA. Kind of."[all the while I'm thinking about what she'll think when she actually finds out about him xD]

[JazzieAussie]

"Hold still. I'm trying to imagine you bald."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Just now:
*watching Pittsburgh/Tampa Bay hockey game*
Mom: "Quiet hockey game."
Me: "Yeah. IT'S 'CAUSE CROSBY ISN'T PLAYING; Why bother getting excited or watch it? XDD"
Mom: "Yeah. That's WHY we're watching it."

[TanzPinguin]

On phone:

Me: "Mmmmmm you girlfriend knows how to satisfy herself, man."
Fro: ".... What are you doing? O_O"
Me: "Eating an eclaire " XDD

[Tolby]

Frog has a girlfriend?:sad:

[Avaron]

When I was texting a friend...
Friend: I wouldn't have know that if he didn't remind me. I'm clearly not very organized.
Me: hahaha, upi are organized enough
Friend: upi?
Me: oops

[milli]

During a pep-talk session at a board exam review center, the speaker told us: "Don't worry if you feel like you haven't studied enough for the exam. Just remember... you cannot unlearn what you don't know." XD

[JazzieAussie]

"... Oh wait. I think I might have a TV in my room. I'll have to go look."

Sure sign of a messy room.

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "This juice... It's like drinking a mango!"
"duh."
xD

[MicroRave]

Me: Hey Janelle, on the Teletubbies, what were those pancake things called?
Janelle: Uh....
Sharlie: TUBBY CUSTARD.
Me: ... How. How do you know that.

Nah, those were Tubby Toast...

Tubby Custard was in the swirly bowls...

Me: HOW DID I KNOW THAT!?!

[MicroRave]

Polonius Vanil☆ says (9:00 PM):
CALGARY IS AVERAGE

ギルガメッシュ says (9:00 PM):
GOOD ENOUGH

[Ponyprincess]

K: chip shop has a job why don't you apply for that? Me: it's one day a week and I don't fancy working in a chip shop. K: but it's work, are you actually looking for a job? Me:yes I'm looking but there's not much point getting a one say job that's won't even pay my rent. K: prove Ur looking for work then. Me *phone receives texts*. Texts reads "interviews for two chimneys will be held from 10 till 2 tomorrow, please bring your cv. Thanks". "so is that proof enough for you"? K: ....

[TanzPinguin]

Jess: Come down here so I can feed you skyline.

[Silverwolf]

Man: You know, Lady, if I could rearrange the letters of the alphabet I'd put U and I together.
Lady: I'd put FTRE together.
Man: What's that?
Lady: A future without U.

[Turnip Head]

"unicorns kicked my ass"

- Tomo

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Jeopardy: "The final category is "CANADA". What a good category."
Me: "Question: Who's the biggest idiot running in the election tonight?"

YES.
STUPID ELECTION.

[Ponyprincess]

I can't remember how the conversation started but I managed to twist my boyfriends words into he'll take me out :D. Me: so does this mean Ur gonna take me out again? Adam: how do u always manage to twist my words? Me: :D u make it to easy, so your taking me out right? Adam: we will see. -next day- Me: so il meet u at five tomorrow? Adam: yup and we can go on our date! Me:...wait Ur actually taking me out? Adam: -cool face- I won a meal for two in a raffle. O_O! I'm thinking I should twist his words more often

[TanzPinguin]

Me: I hurt my shoulder stretching
Mark: Well then I guess you better warm up before you stretch

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Teacher: "... Alright. Who wrote "I like little boys" on my answer sheet?"

And...

Dad: "... Why is there a banana sitting on that clock?"

[JazzieAussie]

Iggy Snap says:
NOT SURE
Iggy Snap says:
THE GUY MAKES IT CONFUSING THOUGH. XD
Iggy Snap says:
AND LONG
Iggy Snap says:
AND DRAWN OUT
Iggy Snap says:
AND FAKE WORDS POSSIBLY
TNTomo says:
FAKE WORDS?!
TNTomo says:
SO IT WAS ALL A RUSE
TNTomo says:
...A DISTACTION
TNTomo says:
*TAKES YOUR CAR*

[Lupia]

I told this extremely hilarious and longwinded joke about rabbits taking rabbit exams about bunny literature, like watership down, but I forgot it..

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: "Hey so I heard there's a cougar lurking around this area. o_o"
Mom: "Really? That's kind of strange."
Me: "Yeah. And y'know, I seen part of the Heartland show the other day, or whatever; there was a cougar on it. I ALWAYS THOUGHT THEY WERE DARK OR BLACK. Like a jaguar."
Mom: "Nope."
Me: "Yeah. I was enLIGHTENED."

[MicroRave]

Ali says:
everytime u fart it gives me stronger of stinach
Sugar Rave says:
then i'll poop
Ali says:
double bost up

Ali says:
ohh u stab me in the heart
Sugar Rave says:
*keeps stabbing*


Ali says
grope huge
Sugar Rave says:
uh...
Alcina says:
xD
Sugar Rave says:
You mean group
Alcina says:
LOL
Ali says:
yesHis English sometimes xD

Sugar Rave says:
too late
smokey's pissed at me now
BUT IT SERVES HIM RIGHT FOR NOT MOVING!!!
¿ Sir Chompski ? says:
http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png
DAMN IT SMOKEY
Froggy says:
I leave for five minutes and I hear of hat killing dog hokcey on facebook and the royal wedding

[Sgt. Frog]

Me: *Gets Kicked*
OW!
G: Oh sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, just kick you.

0___o Your logic.....

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mom: "I think shrews are the smallest mammals on earth."
Me: "But I thought seahorses... AHAH. Nevermind."


Jade: "On average how many bus rides do we take in a school year?"
Me: "... *calculates* 40 per month."
Jade: "How many months are we in school for?"
Me: "*Counts on fingers*"
Me: "..."
Me: "Wow. That was the stupidest thing I've done lately. I could have just subtracted July and August..."

[JazzieAussie]

1: "Where'd you get a job interview?"
2: "Not telling yet."
1: "Oh, I bet you're not telling because you applied somewhere DIRTY."
2: "What, where would I do that?!"
1: "HOME DEPOT."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Mrs H-B: "That karate teacher had something like 6 stripes on black or something. o_o"
Wyatt: "I have 11."
Mrs H-B: "I'm Chuck Norris."

^ Best comeback ever from one of our teachers.

[Sgt. Frog]

Vani: DUCK WATER CAN.
Frog: DUCK! *WATERING CAN*
Vani: *waters sprouting pop can tree*
Frog: *Harvest time*
Vani: *sickles*
Vani: *bundles*
Vani: *grinds*
Vani: *takes wheat to market*
Vani: *makes bread with leftover flour*
Vani: *Doesn't share*
Vani: *red hens*
Frog: *starves*
Frog: *dies*
Vani: *funerals*

[JazzieAussie]

Tomo Oats says:
OR EVEN A TOILET SUIT
Tomo Oats says:
..SEAT

--------

That both sounds awful AND CONFUSING so I want to hug you, but also draw a graph.

--------

*throws glitter on Tomo so he'll sparkle!!*

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Me: *looks in bag on brothers table* "Uh oh, that's totally not appropriate."
Mom: "Oh god that's x rated. Get it out of here."
Me: "This is shameful. Can't believe this. Good thing Grandma's not here. If she saw this, she WOULD NOT approve."
Mom: "What is it?"
Me: "Final Fantasy games."

[glazedmoon]

11:30 PM - boy_tomo_chan: it was like 100 bugs on amazong haha
11:30 PM - boy_tomo_chan: ..
11:30 PM - boy_tomo_chan: ..

[MicroRave]

Me: 50 gloves or 50 pairs?
Mom: Doesn't matter... only use one at a time

Mom: Who's that?
Me: Muffy
Mom: She looks like a hooker
Me: Nah she lives at the bar
Mom: Most hookers live in bars

Me: Why're you watching this? It's in Cantonese
Dad: *smiles* Boobies

Me: Who's the guy?
Amanda: Where?
Me: Top middle
Amanda: lolwut? He's a guy
Me: WUT!?! Oh yeah... boobs

[TanzPinguin]

Dwayne: I'm goin to Walmart, need anything?
Me: Yeah I need some yarn
Dwayne: DO YA GOT THE KNITTIN STICK?

XD

[TanzPinguin]

Me: They make dresses too short now you can't even bend over in em. David: What, you got a problem with the way I dress?

[JazzieAussie]

"I feel myself slipping into a pit... I'm eating cinnamon toast in my bed."

[TanzPinguin]

"Mommy give me a hug!"
"No get the f*** away."
XD

[MicroRave]

Me: I spend lots of time outside my room.
Dad: Yeah, you spend it on the computer in the living room.
Me: That's because you yell at me for talking over the TV.
Dad: .......http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.pnghttp://img266.imageshack.us/img266/9057/hotdogcensor.png.... she got me.

[TanzPinguin]

*Chillin in the kitchen*

Tammie: "Blueberries, you so sexy."

[Fanny]

"How many pennies are there in 50 cents?"

[Ponyprincess]

Me:" I've got your Harry potter ticket for the Thursday Midnight showing"
Terry: "Do you dare ne to go in my dumbledor costume?"
Me: "No, no I don't"
Terry: "Tara?"
Me: "What"?
Terry: "I'm going in my dumbledoor costume."
Me: "yay...."

[hArVeStMoOnLuVeR]

Dad: *wearing a t-shirt with this (http://i.ebayimg.com/00/$(KGrHqEOKi0E1zwMFp7nBNv2TVi6Q!~~0_35.JPG) on it*
Random lady in restaurant: "... Are you really looney?"

[Ponyprincess]

-Recieve texts which makes no senses-
-Rings Adam-
Me: You're drunk arnt you
Adam: a little bit
Me: by little do you mean really really drunk?
Adam: ye...I BOUGHT YOU A HAT!
Me: aw thank you *hears cars* are you still out?
Adam: Yeah! I was with some people but they ditched me, well they didn't actually ditched me, I ditched them because I have work at 6:30 so I left... I BOUGHT YOU A HAT!!!
Me: I know you you already said. Thank you
Adam: well actually bought it for me but it doesn't fit so I descided you can have it, you might not get it for a while though cause it's on my head.
Me: it doesn't fit you but it's on you head?
Adam: yeah
Me: .... So, a little bit drunk huh?



XD muppet!

[MicroRave]

*playing 007 Nightfire*

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRISTMAS!!! HERE'S YOUR PRESENT!!!!

[TanzPinguin]

*On phone with Nica*
*Weird period commercial comes on*

Nica: Give that bitc* a tampon, bitc*es love tampons.

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

TIE says (1:44 AM):
*... Ew, this pudding tastes like men...

[Sgt. Frog]

Frog -E says
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fVe5UHJmAg

Vaniii ☆ says
... IF THAT SONG MAKES ME ANY MORE HUNGRY...

[TanzPinguin]

"Beat up, beat up, beat up with Jesus"
"Sweetie I think that's sposed to be meet up"
"Ohh.. yeah that makes more sense."

[Solash]

A small smidget of my conversation with Frog

Me: ...We just went from talking about Girls to DnD.
Him: ..nerds

[TanzPinguin]

*Talking about me breaking into my house yesterday*
Me: "I had to like stand on a bush that was about to collapse and I was struggling so hard to get into my window.. It was attractive."
Jimmy: "....I bet. Sounds sexy as f*ck."

[Mona101]

Kid: Mommy look! I found this dead bird outside!
Mother: That's nice dear. *watches tv and pays no attention to him.*
((The next day))
Kid: WAAAH Mommy I broke my foot. DX
Mother: That's nice dear. *continues watching tv*

[Ponyprincess]

Hayley: "Tara did you get the paper"?
Me : "Huh, what paper"?
Paul *thinking she meant newspaper* "Edible paper Tara"
Me: " OH! yeah, thank you" *Starts eating edible paper"
Hayley: "Yeah the edible paper"
Paul: "...I was joking"






Hayley: *Brings in box of Thornton chocolates into the room*
Paul : "Pigging out with your edible paper and chocolate"
Hayley: "Oh, these aren't mine, they're everyone's"
Me: "Yoink" *Bites into chocolate"
Barbara: "Why did we get given them?
Hayley: "They're out of date"
Me: "................"

[TanzPinguin]

David: Are marshmellows supposed to be hairy?
Me:.. what? no! no they aren't
David: *facepalm* I meant strawberries not marshmellows.

o_o

[MicroRave]

Dad: 4 bucks for a loaf of bread.
Me: That's alot of bread!

[Sgt. Frog]

Frog says:
...
Did you fail at toaster? O_O


Vaniii ☆ says:
.... ....
I CAN EXPLAIN IT

[TanzPinguin]

"GOOD MORNING LAMAR! :D"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Me: "Enjoy your food guys"
Lady I just showed to table: "You too! ::D:"
Me: "...but.. I'm not eating right now?" xD

[Ponyprincess]

Hayley: "She's such a cow, if she does it again i'm going to moan"
Me: "Hahaha"
Hayley: "What?"
Me: "She's such a cow, if she does it again i'm going to MOOOOOan"

[MicroRave]

"How is it I just farted loudly and no-one noticed?"



That and every possible dirty joke you can make about meat. This is why I love BBQs.

[Ponyprincess]

Terry -watcing a youtube video-
*non stop laughing*
Me: "What are you laughing at?"
Terry: "The video says turn the volume up hehehe"
Me: "..."

[Sgt. Frog]

Vaniii ☆ says: I have no more mexican like men though because teacher stole them. D:

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Sgt. Frog says (10:54 PM):
*I USE WOMEN

[Sgt. Frog]

For catching me out of context, I will WILL get you back.

[Boy_Tomo_Chan]

Thats impossible, since I catch myself first and then put it in this thread.

[MicroRave]

A CHALLENGE!